Padres Face Off Against Jeff Samardzinotgonnaworkhereanymore
After a glorious sweep of the poo poo Giants, the Padres head out to Chicago to face the hated Cubs. We can look forward to Kyle Blanks hitting infinity home […]
Super Cheater Ryan Braun in Town to be Pummeled
Ryan Braun doesn’t get enough booing for how big of a steroid using, loophole using cheater that he is. Luckily, we have our chance tonight against the hated Brewers. Let’s […]
Padres to Decapitate Giants Tonight
Heartbreaking loss last night. At this point, us Padres fans should be pretty desensitized to losses of all kinds, so whatever. Worst case, we watch these losses, crush some high […]
Realistically, how can the Padres NOT sweep the Giants? Also, Madison Bumgarner is a butthead.
After a crushing sweep of the terrible Doyers, the Padres get ready to pound the stupid fartface Giants. Clouded by controversy the past few weeks, the Padres are sending Edinson […]
Padres Win! Matt Kemp Is The Worst.
After a thrilling and crushing victory for the Padres last night, led by our newest power hitting star Eric Stults, the Padres can continue crushing the Dodgers and their weenie “star” Matt […]
Assuming Volquez Can Hit the Target, Padres Will Behead Rockies Tonight
Edinson Volquez pitched one of the single most impressive outings I’ve seen EVER last year when he threw his 1 hitter. The stadium was as into it as a 14,000 […]
Padres to Crush Rockies: Troy Tulowitzki has a Special Talent
After last night’s exciting and awesome display of Ron Swanson-esque manliness by Carlos Quentin, Clayton Richard, and the Padres in general (you know, except for winning the game), the Pads […]
New Petco Park Food/Beer. Beer Prices Hiked!
Opening day at Petco Park is always one of the most exciting days of the season. Not only is the place sold out, but the crowd is always super into […]
Home Opener! Dodgers Hit the Golden Showers
To celebrate the long awaited home opener, we bring you our expert prediction via MS Paint illustration of today’s game. The Padres can’t possibly start the season 1-6. Right? RIGHT?!?! […]
Dexter Fowler – Glory Hole Addict
As long as the Padres want to continue this silly charade of not playing winning baseball, we here at Padres Jagoff can keep harassing the opposing team via MS Paint […]
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